Angry Mothers Fight To Bump “Hump Day” From Calendar

The Return of the Modern Philosopher

protest Dozens of members of Protesting United Mothers Against Sexualization (PUMAS) took to the streets of Washington, DC today to urge the Federal Government to ban the use of “Hump Day” as a slang term for Wednesday.

“Our children are subjected to too much sexuality at an early age because of lower moral standards and higher access to the social media,” Margie Simmons, PUMAS Founder and Chairwoman, told this Modern Philosopher.  “We want our politicians, who are the carriers of the moral torch, to take action to help out children stay sweet and innocent.  Because of this, we want the H Day term stricken from the vernacular.”

The PUMAS marched within sight of The White House, and apparently their message made it to President Obama’s ears because he did issue the following statement: “I hear what the PUMAS are saying, and I support their cause, but there’s nothing I can do…

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